8 Things I Never Want To Do...

I've stolen today's prompt from here and here, who originally stole it from here (I think).  The concept of a reverse bucket list seems pretty easy until you take out the horrible stuff, like get hit by a car, fall forty feet into a pit of lava, and get caught splitting your pants on the exact same day you ran out of undies. When you then factor in the fact that I try to live by the "try anything once" rule and the "If I didn't completely hate it, I'll try it again" rule, it really becomes difficult.  Because honestly, if I had the opportunity to bungee jump, sky dive, or speak to Congress, I'd probably do it.

1.  Own and Drive a minivan.  This is important, as it is not so much the fact that I NEED a minivan, what with all the extra crap/kids/lumber for home improvement projects that I must haul around, but that I must maintain my image of being a cool Mom and not Carol Brady.  And cool moms don't drive wood paneled minivans.  Please feel free to forget the fact that I drive a beige station wagon, and not a red mustang. Mkay...

2.  Be famous.  Seriously, all that pressure of having to look good all the time AND behave myself?  Who needs it.  Besides, there would be nothing but scandalous pictures of my jiggly bits at the beach anyway.

3.  Be rich.  Again, no thanks.  I'd like to be comfortably well off, but rich just brings problems, usually with baggage from your past that parks on your doorstep and says "Remember me?  You promised to love me 4-eva in high school before I dumped your sorry butt after 25 seconds!  I just know we'll be best friends!"


4.  Get Divorced again.  Let's just file this one under once is TOTALLY enough.

5.  Live in the rain forest along side nature.  Yeah, gotta say, as adventurous as that would be, I am just not one that does well without a shower EVERY morning.  And don't try and tell me that I could shower in a beautiful waterfall and be at peace with my inner self.  My inner self does just fine with soap and HOT water, and can do without fish and whatever else is going on upstream falling all over my naked body.  Thankyouverymuch.

6.  Drive a car in Rome.  Seriously.  Have you seen the way they drive?  Give me a scooter or a bicycle any day.  Now, outside of Rome is a totally different story.

7.  Run a marathon.  Yes.  This was once on my bucket list.  It's now off the list, for the sheer fact that I am far too lazy to do this for real.   I can be highly motivated to just about anything, but the thing about motivation is that you have to be motivated every day for it to work.  So, 26.2 miles? Meh.  Not unless someone's chasing me.

8. Wrestle a gator. Do I even need to explain this one?






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